The Next Cindy Sheehan?

I remember the early days of Cindy Sheehan, when Democrats were happy to hand her a microphone so she could harass President Bush outside his Crawford Ranch about the Iraq War. Gosh, that was fun.

But as soon as I heard her mention Israel, I thought, “Oh crap. Here it comes.” Since then, Cindy’s been hanging out with Hugo Chavez and threatening to run for Congress against Barbara Boxer and Nancy Pelosi because they’re not Left-wing enough.

So I had to laugh when I saw this headline on FOXNews.com on election eve:

Joe the Plumber: Obama will bring "death to Israel"

“Here it comes,” I thought. And Joe hasn’t disappointed. From his flirtation with a country music career to grumbling about running for Congress, Joe has transformed from political symbol to pop culture diva.

And now it gets even better. Joe’s attacking John McCain, saying he felt “dirty” campaigning for the guy. Joe says McCain’s policies “appalled me, absolutely. I was angry. In fact, I wanted to get off the bus after I talked to him.”

That’s gratitude for ya.

But Joe still loves Sarah Palin. “Palin is absolutely the real deal,” he said. Yes, she is, Joe. And I hope the Republican Party embraces the two of you as tight as it can.

Sarah Palin: Freeloader-in-Chief

$180K in clothes? That was just the beginning.

Also on the dime of the GOP’s generous donors… Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin’s fashion stylist was paid $54,900 by the Republican National Committee.

McCain campaign donors got hosed, too, and so did the taxpayers (the campaign accepted public matching funds, remember?)… Gov. Sarah Palin’s traveling makeup artist was paid $68,400 and her hair stylist received more than $42,000 for roughly two months of work.

Clothes: $180,000
Stylist: +$54,900
Make-Up: +$68,400
Hair Stylist: +$42,000
-----------
Total: $245,300

An Obama victory: Priceless.

HA HA HA HA!

Dear Republicans,

Next time the RNC asks you for money, please keep this in mind!

Sincerely,
Calvin

2012 Watch

On TV…

The “Our Country Deserves Better” PAC is now airing TV ads to thank Sarah Palin for the 2008 campaign. While our country does deserve better than Sarah Palin and I am grateful for her role in McCain’s crushing defeat, these are apparently pro-Palin ads. Go figure. Looks like someone is already shelling out some serious cash to position Palin for the next go-around.

Meanwhile…

Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal (R) is chatting up flood victims in Iowa because it’s totally normal and not conspicuous at all for governors of Louisiana to do that.

Hank Jr. for Senate!

ARE YOU READY FOR SOME (POLITICAL) FOOTBALL??

Hank Williams, Jr., has announced he will run for the U.S. Senate!

Hank Jr. lives in Montana, so presumably he’s thinking of challenging freshman Senator Jon Tester (D) in 2012. Tester will be a top target for Republicans, since he won in 2006 with less than 50% of the vote against a scandal-plagued incumbent (the disgraceful and idiotic Conrad Burns).

After campaigning for weeks by Sarah Palin’s side, it’s no wonder Hank Jr. thinks he’s qualified for high office. Why do so many Republicans think a passionate, idealistic (if often vague) devotion to patriotism and the Bible is all it takes to craft complex legislation and/or lead the free world?

Principles, no matter how strong or righteous, do not make up for a lack of information or intelligence.

(Note: this news comes from CMT, which only notes that Hank Jr. plans to run in “the next primary election.” That would be 2010, of course – so maybe Hank Jr. plans to carpetbag his way into another state’s election rather than challenge Tester in 2012.)

2012 Primary Standings (Republican)

No, it's not too early.

1. Newt Gingrich

After the 2008 debacle, the GOP may well overcompensate with the anti-McCain. Gingrich is ideologically pure, fiercely partisan, and perfectly comfortable spitting vile. He also gives a smooth speech and thinks strategically. The exact opposite of McCain.

Of course, he’s also emblematic of everything everyone outside of the Far Right hates about politics. But that may only help him in the primary.

2. Mitt Romney

At the other end of the spectrum, there’s the Mayor of Pandertown. If Obama is crazy popular, the GOP may panic. They’ll ditch the purists for someone they think can appeal to the moderates. And they’ll want someone with deep pockets because the donors aren’t likely to waste their cash against a popular incumbent.

3. Jeb Bush

The Bush name may be mud right now, but hey -- W still won. That means a lot when your party is on the outside of the White House looking in. The GOP needs someone to reunite W’s winning coalition of business and religious factions. Jeb may look like their best shot.

4. Charlie Crist/Tim Pawlenty

Crist screams vice president, so he may run just to up his chances of being picked #2 on the ticket. But as a popular governor of a critical swing state, he may find himself picking up surprising momentum from the non-fundamentalists. Pawlenty is kinda like Crist but without those pesky rumors.

5. Sarah Palin

Can her cult of personality carry her through the primaries? Don’t bet on it. The GOP base may love her folksy nitwittery when she’s opposite a Democrat--but when she’s on stage against the Republican heavyweights, they can’t help but notice she’s ridiculously outmatched.

6. Bobby Jindal

He’s a minority! That makes him just as good as Obama, right? Jindal is a successful and popular governor, so he deserves better than for Republican evangelicals to jump on his bandwagon just because of his skin color.

7. Kay Bailey Hutchison

Sarah Palin may inspire Hutchinson to run just so that nutjob isn’t the only example of a Republican woman that America gets to see. It also may get Hutchinson on someone’s VP list.

8. Mike Huckabee

His loyal followers will be enough to keep him in the race a good long time but not enough to make him a serious contender.

9. Bill Frist

If Bill Frist wins the governor’s mansion in 2010, he’ll be eyeing the White House in 2016 immediately. If he wins huge, he may think about capitalizing on that momentum right away. Either to position himself for 2016 or to be on someone’s VP list.

10. Rudy Giuliani

He’ll run to stay relevant. He’s not going to be a factor.

11. Fred Thompson

Thompson may have a big enough ego to let himself get “drafted” again. But the GOP has seen this movie before--and they walked out in the first 15 minutes last time.